Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

Flop dog

Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

British Dentistry

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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