Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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The Bible

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

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hi corey

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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what do you call a black man on a bike? a black man on a bike.

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops