What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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I dropped two snare drums and a cymbal down a hole earlier. They're probably broken now.

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Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops