What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

Why did the man go to the toilet with his brother? Because Mario and Luigi had to go down in it.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I'm sorry your brother died

What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

Why aren't there alligators in a bookstore? Because alligators would pose a danger to customers.

How do you know when you're on a Jewish golf course? The players don't yell 'FORE' they yell '$3.99!' @Obsequiously

Why is the sky blue? Well it has something to do with The suns reflection off of all the waters on earth's surface.

That's why her hair is so big, she teases it and uses a lot of expensive products.

Why didn't the girl make it to the other side of the road? A police officer stoped her because she was j-walking.

wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

what did the deaf man say to his long-lost paraplegic brother? He did audibly make noise as deafness from birth meant that the capacity to form words through sound was much reduced, and instead simply gestured a greeting of loving familiarity.

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

Obama

What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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