What sounds really bad? An accordion.

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Q.why did the chicken cross the road A. To eat some Kentucky Fried Chicken get it KFC

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Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

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We didnt star the fire ...........

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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Geography Teacher: Bill, British Columbia agreed to join confederation when the government of Canada agreed to do what? Bill: To build a bridge to where my father is who is divorced with my mom.*tear* Geography Teacher: Is that really nesscary Bill? You have a detention.

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This one sucks!

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what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

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There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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Your Momma's So fat, that she is quite unhealthy, and she should stop spending her life savings at fast food restaurants. Probably should stop drinking pop as well.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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How did the asian find his family? He didn't because they all look the same.

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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a man texted his wife saying "hey sexy, how was your day?(;" unfortunately, she never replied because she got in a cr accident and died from texting while driving.

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I like my coffee the same way I like my woman with big tits I lied about the woman

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

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Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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