What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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What's worse then forced to eat frog legs? Xbox one

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Why did the monkey fall of the tree? Because Newtons law states that we are all under the influence of gravity and hence an object, in this case the monkey, will fall down if it failed to stay on the tree.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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How come George hit his face when he fell? He had no arms.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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what is big and white? the moon

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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"Have you ever seen a blacksmith?" "No." "Me neither."

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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involved parents.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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