How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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http://anti-joke.com/

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knock knock

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Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

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Gestapo.

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Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

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Why didnt the black man run the marathon? He was in jail

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What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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no

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Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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A seal walks into a club. Do you like my new shoes?

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

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The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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