I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

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Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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Can I touch it?

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

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what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

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What did Lady Gaga say to Justin Timberlake? "I love the Backstreet Boys!" Justin Timberlake Replied with a Bazooka.

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a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

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How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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