What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

How many prostitutes do I have to kill in order to get an erection? Three.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he was quickly shot down because he was mistaken for a whale.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

like for a handjob.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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