scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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where would you hide 100 dead jews in a car the ashtray because they were all cremated

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

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(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

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9/11

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't change anything.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

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Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops