How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

The Pope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll ya have, Pope?" But the Pope's grasp of English is tenuous at best, so he mumbles something in Latin. The bartender doesn't know any Latin. The Pope gets frustrated and leaves.

A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter can escape the chambers.

There's a blonde, Brunette and a Redhead stuck at the top of a cliff. A genie appears and says he will grant them each one wish. The Brunette wishes she could at the bottom of the cliff, The redhead wishes she could be back with her children and the blonde would just love to be back to her family. :/

What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

How can you tell which kids belong to Dolly Parton? From the strech marks on their lips :|

Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

-Knock knock. -Who's there? -Doctor. -Docter who? -Yes...

What do you call a group of men terrible at their jobs? The Mets

whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

The NHL playoffs

what did the chicken say to the farmer? nothing, chickens dont talk.

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

Q:What did the goat die? A: I dont know everything dies

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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