Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +24

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

whats the difference between a cat and a rooster? who the hell cares, all black people should die

thumb_up thumb_down -170

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Chuck Norris watches TV.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

so an american, a Hispanic, and a Indian walk into a bar in Washington D.C, and the bartender says to the american "I'm sorry, but u have to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops