The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

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Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

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What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

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Lol, thats sweet, you making me nervous in a good way now. No, the thing is that I need to use this crap every morning, yeah, but its late here now, and since I was born with this condition, remembering is far easier than forgetting, and while the bleeding has stopped now, I was never in any pain whatsoever, and the bleeding would have stopped eventually because of you know... Coagulation? But, if I lets say spend a week without my meds, things would look pretty ugly. I get the meds for cheap, by my new doctor since the old one was a bitch... Excuse me, can we take five minutes? I know I said I would return last time and did not, but I will, I am just a bit... Well, I need a bit more blood in my body right now, I am fine, no danger... If I where I would not be chatting here, but getting my ass of to the doc.

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why does god never feel anger? Because you need to exist to have feelings.

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What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

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Roses are red, violets are blue something stinks and I think it's you!

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Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone he proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic and it's ruining his life.

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What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

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What happens when you have fish and a rhino mate? Nothing, that is physically impossible, a rhino is a lot bigger than a fish and it would not be possible for a rhino to do that with a fish considering a rhino can't breathe under water and a fish can't breath with out air.

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Why did the blond crave hotdogs for breakfast? She was likely suffering a sodium deficiency from violently throwing up the night before.

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Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

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A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops