A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

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8============D PEN1S

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What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

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A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

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Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

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What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

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Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

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What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

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Womens rights.

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1unno;njfjk

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 new what 6 and 9 were doing.....

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When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

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Whats big white and can't climb trees? A Fridge. Whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.

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Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

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What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

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How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

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What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

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What did the chilean guy told to the other chilean guy? Hola!

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

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A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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