What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call Obama? - the president

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Go away.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +19

there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops