whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

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Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Q: how do you get a man with one arm out of a tree? A: shoot him

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Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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corey is a nipplepotomus

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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The glass is half an hour.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

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Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

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How does Ray Charles see? He doesn't, he plays piano.

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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