A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

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High school gym class.

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yo mamas like a spider always getting wrapped up in her own cu*

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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Feet

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What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

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Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

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Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a self-absorbed prick. And, honestly, the chicken and the road weren't that great of friends anyway.

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What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is very bad looking

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

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What did the blind, deaf, mute child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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