roses are red, violets are blue, get in that bed or I stick your head down the loo! Christian grey

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

a horse walks into a barn

"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh my gosh, my yard is on fire!!!

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Yo mama so fat she died

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Tacos

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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