What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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Black people

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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My dad beats my mom At checkers

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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