How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than dieing? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you scare a black man? You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a something with no limbs? a snake

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

thumb_up thumb_down -21

cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops