Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Not your cheese.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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Women's Rights

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Englishman jumps off the cliff. The American also jumps off the cliff. He is followed by the Frenchman. Suicide and depression are major problems in today's world regardless of nationality.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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