Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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