Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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amy copied adams haircut :0

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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Goat balls.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

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A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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