Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

what is worse than a guy pissed?

A pope meets another one

What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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