Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -14

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

thumb_up thumb_down -14

so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops