A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

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What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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