A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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hi charles lattuca III

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why did the girl fall off the swing ? because she had no arms.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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What's the best way to anger a Muslim? Key his car in front of him.

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What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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