what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

HELLO EVERYONE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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