How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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A jew enters a mall.

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What is worse than a papercut? Losing your legs in Vietnam.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whos a sick fuck? jake morris

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What do you call a blond reading a book? A blond reading a book.

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Your mamma's such a whore, she sleeps with men who pay her.

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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what do jews, blacks, and asians have in common? they have all been targets of racism!

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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