Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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The cream, it is coming

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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please thumbs this up to help rhinos with boners thank you

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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How do you kill a circus? Assuming this is metaphorical usage of the word 'kill', you would withdraw funds, involve the SPCA and offer all the major performers better contracts elsewhere.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops