Why was a black man running in the street with my wallet in his hand? Because he saw me dropping it and was trying to reach me to give it back.

What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

What does a blind, deaf, parapalegic baby get for christmas? Cancer.

How many Jews did Hitler kill during the Holocaust? Too many.

Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

Three men are walking and one falls over, he then gets up and continues walking.

He is so gay that he likes penis.

What do you call a black man carrying a bag full of drugs? A police officer who has just confiscated the bag from a drug dealer and is on his way to send the bag off to be destroyed.

Why couldn't little Billy jump? He was dead.

Q:Why did the black man break into the KFC? A: Due to being recently fired from his job, he is not earning any income. The lack of money to support his family of 5 drove him to such a desperate state that he found breaking into restaurant the only way to provide for his loved ones.

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

What did the shark say to the elephant? Nothing, they live in different habitats

Knock knock! "Who's there?" "It's me, xx" "Okay, come in."

How many babies can fit inside a trash can? Seven.

A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

Q. What did Tarzan Say when he met Jane? A. Tarzan Being raised by apes and not learning English would have no knowledge of the language and would probably hoot and screech like his fellow ape brothers

A tiger walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gets him a drink because he would rather not get vigorously consumed by a mighty beast.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

why so serious? because your too serious.

Knock knock. Come in. You're under arrest for second degree murder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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