salad days!

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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Trump will make America great again.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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