What do you get if you pour water over a firework? A wet firework

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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What did the Polish man say to his doctor? "Witam, doktorze. By?em kaszel z ostatnich kilku tygodni i jest wysypka na moim lewym ramieniu. Czy jest co? co mo?na zrobi?, aby mi pomóc?" I don't know what it means, either.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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