Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

How do you end a sentence

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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