Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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Canada

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Oh...okay, good.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Robin, get in the car.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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A man walks into a bar and says ow. Two men walk into a bar, which is weird, because the second guy should have seen it coming.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops