What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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What did Sam Houston Say to Jim Bowie when he say all the Mexicans coming Towards the Alamo? That's a lot of Mexicans.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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