- Anti Joke

What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

What's red and has wheels? A red car

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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