why did the man stop his bike he was having a heart attack

whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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