Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops