A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

I wonder where the hell Hitler is

A dyslexic Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. He hits his head on it and is rushed to the hospital,only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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