What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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What happened to the man who bought his son a birthday gift? He eventually was robbed and shot in the face

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops