Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Hobos are like Obama they want change.

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Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Whats a blind catholics biggest fear? The priests power of chris compelling him

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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roses are red violets are blue they really are

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whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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