Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Michel Moor on a die...

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

Why are black men's genitals larger than white men's genitals. Black men's genitals are made up of more skin cells.

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

Chris is hairy

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

Four men are stranded on a small desert island. The first of them decides to build a raft out of bamboo, but it only has room for one passenger. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he shouted to the men on shore as he left, but a band of pirates killed him in the middle of the ocean. The second castaway was more clever, and built a submarine out of bamboo and sealed it with hides of animals they had killed. He counteracts the buoyant force with sand. In this way, he planned to avoid the pirates by being underwater. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he exclaimed as he sealed the one person sized chamber of his submarine, but not far off shore, he runs out of oxygen and suffocates to death. The third castaway learned from the mistakes of the first two, and in spite of the unpredictability of handcrafted aerial vehicles, he makes a glider. "Don't worry, I will get help when I reach civilization!" he shouts from the hill top of the island as he leaps off and glides over the horizon. Though the journey is fraught with peril, he makes it back to civilization and is reunited with his family. It is expensive, but he prepares an expedition back to the island where his fourth comrade remains. It is worthy to note that on this small island, all the means of making shelter had been used up in the construction of the raft, submarine, and glider. The fourth castaway was found dead from exposure to the elements.

Why did Jenny cry? Because everyday Jenny is bullied. Jenny cried for this reason, but nothing happened. The bully still bullies her today.

Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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