Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Guy1: Hey! Do you want to hear a potassium joke? Guy2: Sure! Guy1: K

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats a blind catholics biggest fear? The priests power of chris compelling him

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are blue they really are

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops