You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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I C U P White stuff

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops