your mom is so fat.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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Where did the people go after the bomb went off? EVERYWHERE!!!

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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Who has no penis Religious Believers

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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