Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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How do you make a baby be quiet when it is crying? slowly choke it to death

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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Why did the black man drown? Because he didn't wait 30 minutes after eating.

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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here's a joke... the american education society

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

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Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

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Why I am at the hospital now: True as it gets. I found on my working desk a small box of fluoride pills, I was like meh, but it said banana, strawberry, mint and pear, so I was like yeah! And grabbed a mouthful before going URGH! Then my friends entered laughing saying "I hope you do well on that test tomorrow!" So yeah, I passed out, and it turns out my "friends" (victims ill torture to they beg for death). 80 MG OF VALIUM!!! Yeah good trucking luck on my test eh? I nearly died twice, somehow, I think I should ask doc if my heart is okay or something, my head is fucked up the floor is all wavy and I cant differentiate numbers Seriously, one guy was gonna come visit say sorry, but he sent his girlfriend instead... My wife was so worried, that when I said: Mind if I have my vengeance by screwing his girlfriend? My wife said: I was so worried, you still okay? That actually sounds like a good scheme... So, yeah... I am typing this because, I am totally going to have a threesome... When and if my ever wakes up again... She agreed... She was always kinda into me but still! If you dont understand this, well... Next time, if you want to poison me, USE SOMETHING THAT KILLS ME! BECAUSE I WILL BE BACK!

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Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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