Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

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Why was the black man arrested? Tax evasion.

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What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

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What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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haha

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops