A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

hi michael

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

Holocaust jokes suck. Anne frankley, I won't stand for them

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

Knock, Knock Come in

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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