What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops